But then, I do tend to whine.
Still, it can be difficult. On the one hand, I live my life
as a hermitess; on the other hand, I’m a wife and mother…even if my “baby” is
now officially an adult. I have one foot in the secular world, the other in the
religious world.
Sort of.
Sometimes when I’m trying to pray, I am distracted by the
perceived need to go check on what's happening elsewhere around the house.
Or, those little demons, knowing my weak spots, nudge me as I pray, saying, “Did
you remember to make the mortgage payment?” Or sometimes it's something something as mundane and
inconsequential as, “You forgot to put in a load of laundry!”
If I lived here all by myself, things would be different.
For one thing, I wouldn’t live here! I would find a different place, with less
maintenance required. For another thing, there would be fewer bills, and there
would not be overspending.
But what would I do with the dogs?
Well, it is no use wandering off into the fantasy world of
thoughts of a potential future. Today has enough worries of its own, right? I
have before me what God has given me. I don’t always see what I’m supposed to
be doing, but I know He has a plan for me to work out my salvation.
So I will banish the “if only” thoughts once again, give
thanks to God, and carry on.
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